


In Darkness We Feel Our Way

by movementinthedark



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Enemies to Lovers, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Post Episode IX, Rey is having a hard time, Reyux, all the feels, but doesn't actually occur in the fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-18
Updated: 2018-04-11
Packaged: 2019-04-03 23:59:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 17,545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14007681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/movementinthedark/pseuds/movementinthedark
Summary: Battle-weary and consumed with grief, Rey impulsively rescues an injured General Hux from the wreckage of the First Order. Alone in an abandoned settlement, and both angry, wary, and trying to regain their footing post-conflict, Rey and Hux come to find solace in each other. If hatred can give way to companionship, could it eventually become love? Set post an imagined Episode IX.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I fell down a Hux fanfic hole due to my great admiration for Domhnall Gleeson and discovered a whole lot of pairings that I'd never before thought about! As a result, this fic invaded my brain and demanded to be written.
> 
> A note on the archive warning: there is no major character death within the fic, but the (prior) death of more than one character is discussed/referenced. I struggled a bit with committing to the death of certain characters, but it was necessary in order to get Rey to the place she needs to be in for the story.
> 
> The title of this fic comes from the excellent Delorentos song of the same name.
> 
> I own no rights to anything in the Star Wars universe.

Rey ran towards the hangar, ignoring the sting of her fresh wounds and the dull, hollow ache in the pit of her stomach. Harder to ignore was the way the hallway shuddered around her, lights flickering, bits of debris tumbling to the floor. The First Order base was officially a wreckage, and Rey ought to have been elated. They’d _won_. But all she could feel was the tightening coil of dread, the emptiness of grief.

Shoving her emotions down, she raced into the hanger, heading for a small First Order shuttle. Her own X-Wing blown to bits, it would have to do. She had just reached the ship, slamming her palm into the button that would lower the ramp, when a shot rang out, the laser bolt embedding itself in the wobbly pillar beside her. Rey spun on her heel, lightsaber drawn and ready, eyes and mind searching for her assailant. Another shot, and this one grazed her upper arm. She stumbled with a gasp, but desperately held on to her focus.

And then she saw him. Crossing the hangar, slowly, but deliberately, the blaster extended in front of him. He was wearing all black, the First Order uniform and his distinctive red hair clearly visible even from this distance. Rey had never before seen him in person, but she recognized him immediately. The base was in tatters, scattered with dead Stormtroopers, and most of the Resistance troops had already pulled out. How in the _hell_ wasn’t he dead?

He fired again, but this time Rey was ready. She deflected the laser bolts with a sweep of her lightsaber, her free hand reaching towards him, pulling the blaster from his grip. He watched it sail into her hand and then dropped to his knees, as though all of the fight had suddenly left him. Clipping his blaster to her belt, Rey cautiously approached. Once nearer, she could see the dark stain on the shoulder of his tunic. Already wounded, then. Rather despite herself, she’d been impressed by his ability to hit her from such a distance; his aim was even better, then, if he’d managed that after having been shot.

Hux’s eyes held hers as she approached, and they betrayed no remorse, no pain. No fear. Rey hefted the lightsaber in her hand. This man had blown up planets. Taken countless innocent lives. He was ultimately, if not personally, responsible for the deaths of so many Resistance fighters, of people Rey had called friends. Of Finn. _Finn._ The base shook around them, close to collapse. There wasn’t much time. Rey swallowed hard. He deserved to die. If she took him back to the Resistance, he’d meet the same end, if not by lightsaber.

“Well?” The scathing voice drew her from her thoughts. “Are you going to get on with it or not?”

His eyes blazed blue in the flickering light, his face impassive. And Rey was suddenly, overwhelmingly, tired of this. Tired of fighting, tired of pain, tired of death. She retracted her lightsaber’s blade. If Hux was surprised, he didn’t have time to express it before she clocked him upside the head with the handle. He hit the floor.

Another shudder of the building jolted Rey into action, and she dodged a bit of falling debris as she made her way back to her appropriated ship. At the ramp, she paused, glancing back to the man sprawled on the floor. He wasn’t dead, not yet, but he would be soon, either from the shoulder wound or the hangar collapsing on top of him. She should leave him here to die, in the wreckage of his Stormtroopers, and his weapons, and his precious First Order. A fitting end.

Without having made the conscious decision to do so, Rey ran back to Hux’s prone form, dragging him towards the ship. He was lighter than she expected, but, even so, she was breathing heavily when she'd finally hauled him up the ramp and deposited him unceremoniously on the shuttle floor. He didn’t stir. Lifting the ramp, she bolted into the cockpit, hands flying over the controls before she’d even made it into the seat. The ship came to life beneath her, taking off amidst the flying debris, and just barely clearing the opening out into the sky.

Rey fumbled for her com. “Poe? Poe!”

“Rey?!” The familiar tone came down the line, laced with concern. “Kriff, Rey, I thought you were gone, your com went silent.”

“I’m coming out in an Order shuttle,” she told him. “Hold your fire.”

“Okay,” he shouted. “Oh, hang on, I see you. Cutting it awfully close!”

“Just like you,” she quipped back, taking solace in Poe’s brief snort of laughter. Her own smile faded just as quickly, and they lapsed into silence. He already knew, already shared in the grief that marred this monumental day. What more was there to be said?

“Ren?” Poe asked, breaking the silence.

Rey swallowed. “He’s dead.” She didn’t mention Hux. How could she explain it to Poe, when she didn’t understand it herself?

“We’re going to do one more pass,” he told her. “And raze this place to the ground.” It would be an easy attack, she knew. The TIE fighters had been shot out of the sky, the ground cannons decimated. After long years of fighting, the Resistance had finally turned the tables on the First Order. They’d ambushed Kylo Ren and General Hux at their own base and had come away victorious. “You should head back to base, I’ll radio in your call sign.”

But Rey didn’t feel victorious.

“Poe.” She took a breath, wondering even at what she wanted to say. “I need… I need some space. Some time to think, to put myself… back together again.” She sighed. “I think I’m going to find somewhere quiet for a little while, where I can just… be.”

“I understand.” Poe’s voice reached her, warm and kind. “You’ve done so much, Rey. Take whatever time you need.”

And she knew he did understand, at least to an extent. He understood about Finn, about how celebrations would be too much right now; she knew he felt the same. She wasn’t sure that he understood about Kylo Ren, about _Ben_ ; how she’d clung to the hope that she could turn him long after it had become futile, how she’d wished she could honor his parents memory by saving their son. Perhaps Poe did understand, just a bit, insofar as Leia was concerned. He definitely would _not_ understand about the First Order General currently unconscious behind her. She needed to figure out what she was going to do about that. 

“Just don’t leave it too long, yeah?” Poe was saying. “We’ll miss you.”

Rey smiled, blinking back tears. “I’ll be back soon. I promise.”

 

\------------

 

Her first step was figuring out where she was going. After confirming that she had sufficient fuel, Rey began scanning the map of nearby star systems. While she’d seen more of the galaxy in the past few years than she’d ever dreamed possible, there weren’t all that many places that she’d ever called home. Jakku. She was absolutely _not_ going back to Jakku, not that she could reach it in a shuttle this size, anyway. The Falcon. A pang of longing shot through her at the thought of Chewie and BB-8; she’d have some serious explaining to do when she finally got back. A variety of Resistance bases, some more temporary than others.

_Actually_.

Rey scrolled through the map until she found what she was looking for. Qiilura. It wasn’t far from her current location, closer to the decimated First Order base than to the Resistance’s own headquarters. The Resistance had used one particular settlement on the planet as a rendezvous point for the attack, its civilian population having evacuated. She doubted any Resistance troops would return there now; they’d all be headed back to the base. Some of the civilians might eventually make their way home, but not so soon.

Rey programmed in the coordinates, finger hovering over the trigger that would take the ship to lightspeed. She glanced over her shoulder. She _ought_ to return to base. Anyway, really, despite Poe’s understanding, but especially given her unexpected passenger. She _knew_ that. But she’d already been of a mind to take off for a bit, to give herself some space, after everything she’d seen today. Everything she’d done. Rescuing General Hux, for reasons she still couldn’t explain, didn’t have to change that. Did it? And really, she hadn’t actually decided if she _was_ rescuing him. Left where he was, he’d likely bleed out before they reached Qiilura.

Rey closed her eyes.

What a _mess_.

She punched the trigger and the ship shot forward into hyperspace.

 

\------------

 

Rey was already regretting her rash decision by the time she’d hefted the unconscious Hux up onto the nearest bench and wrestled him out of his tunic. Thank Kriff it had fasteners and also that he’d remained out cold. He was still alive, his breathing slightly labored and his pulse increasingly erratic. Rey didn’t think he was likely to wake up, at this point, unless she could stop the bleeding. Under the tunic, he wore a t-shirt, plain except for the First Order insignia emblazoned on the left side of his chest. The shirt was close-fitting and completely covered his wound, though the blood was much more visible now, seeping through the fabric; she’d have to cut it off him. Rey could only imagine what he’d think of that, but she supposed he might prefer it to being dead.

It was definitely a blaster wound to the shoulder, the blood flowing more freely once it wasn’t constrained by his clothing. Carefully peeling away the tatters of his shirt, Rey bunched up a cleaner handful of the cloth and pressed it hard against the injury. Something flickered in his otherwise still face, and Rey watched him carefully, searching for any signs that he might be about to wake. Nothing. Just a pain response, then. Perhaps he was capable of feeling _something_.

Finally, the flow of blood seemed to ease. Retrieving the med kit she’d found on board, Rey pulled out some bacta patches and packed them against the wound, securing them with bandages. He was still bleeding, but it had slowed considerably. Time for the bacta to do its job. She’d been relieved to find it onboard; her medical skills were limited at best.

Satisfied that she’d done what she could, Rey sat back on her heels. It was a strange feeling, to have the feared General Hux at her mercy, so different a scenario from the intense, impassioned battle she’d fought with Kylo Ren just a short time before. Stranger still, that she hadn’t taken any of the obvious opportunities to dispatch the General from the galaxy. It would have been so _easy._

She’d known he was young for his rank, but - seeing him - it surprised her all the same. Although, admittedly, he was considerably older than she. He was thinner than she’d expected, too, especially without his full uniform. And pale. The kind of pale that didn’t exist on Jakku. Rey supposed he’d not spent much time out of uniform, or out of doors.

As he appeared to be more or less medically stable for the time being, Rey tended to her own minor injuries and then returned to the cockpit. It wouldn’t be long now until they reached Qiilura. Sinking into the pilot seat, Rey rested her head in her hands. What in the hell was she _doing_? Memories from the battle at the First Order base echoed through her mind - Kylo Ren, wielding his lightsaber; Ben Solo, fallen at her feet. Finn, hit by blaster fire when she was still too far away to see what was happening; the scream that tore from her throat, the Stormtroopers she’d wrecked in her desperation to reach him. The thud of his body hitting the floor, and the fondness in his eyes when she’d cradled him in her arms, pleading with him to _stay_.

In the silence of the cockpit, Rey wept.

 

\------------

 

His head was fucking _throbbing_. Straining to hear any sounds in the quiet room, Hux was mildly disconcerted at the realization that he had absolutely no idea where he was. The last thing he remembered was staring up at the girl, the _force user_ , standing over him with her lightsaber, her face twisted with fury and hatred and grief. He cautiously opened his eyes. The room was nondescript; plain, but comfortable. It was no First Order accommodations, that was for certain. Probably not the Resistance, either, given that it was a bedroom and not a holding cell. He was still wearing his trousers and boots, but no shirt. He thought he could feel bandages around his shoulder, but twisting his head to try to see them seemed like a spectacularly awful idea.

Hux sat up. Or, rather, tried, because if the ache in his head was bad, the pain shooting through his shoulder was on another level entirely. Once again flat on his back with his eyes squeezed closed, Hux tried to force his body under control. His pain tolerance was usually better than this.

Something cool brushed his forehead, and he tensed.

“You shouldn’t try to move.” A voice came from over his head, female and matter of fact. “You’ve lost a lot of blood.”

Hadn’t he just been alone? Hux opened his eyes again and found that _girl_ peering down at him.

“ _You_.” It was meant to sound accusatory, but it lacked his usual bite. He couldn’t quite get his vocal chords to cooperate.

She smirked. “Me.”

“Where am I?” He attempted to push himself up again, trying to make sense of his surroundings.

“Don’t _move_.” She forced him back down with a hand on his good shoulder. Hux glared. “And we’re on Qiilura.”

He frowned. “Qiilura? There’s no Resistance base there.”

“No, there isn’t.” She conceded. “There’s no one else here. Just us.”

Hux tried to process this unexpected development, but the pain and blood loss were making his brain fuzzy. “Why?” Was all he managed. When no response was forthcoming, he shifted tack to accusation, the memory of their last interaction slowly coming back to him. “I think you’ve given me a concussion.”

She shrugged. “Better than decapitation,” she offered. “And you should really be more concerned with your shoulder wound. _That’s_ what would have killed you.” She eyed him carefully, a tad warily. “You should get some more rest.”

She’d saved his life. She’d- Hux had so many questions, and he didn’t want to ask her any of them. He wanted to get the hell out of here and figure it out for himself. Instead, he found his eyes drifting shut, and he sank back down into sleep.

 

\------------

 

When he awoke again, it was to the call of nature. The room thankfully empty, he struggled first into a sitting position and then to his feet. His shoulder still ached, but his head felt a bit better. He’d made it only two steps across the room when _she_ appeared in the doorway. She took a tentative step towards him, hands outstretched, but the icy look he shot her clearly changed her mind. She inched out of the way and gestured towards the door.

“Refresher’s through there.”

Hux would’ve died before admitting what the short walk took out of him. Leaning heavily against the sink, he evaluated himself in the mirror. He looked like hell. Hair a mess, skin a shade or two paler even than normal, dark circles under his eyes. He couldn’t see the lump on his head, but he could feel it. His shoulder was neatly bandaged, but he could see where a bit of blood had begun to seep through.

When he emerged from the refresher, a noise from the opposite direction to the bedroom caught his attention. He made his way down a short hallway, regrettably using the wall for support, and found the girl in the kitchen. They appeared to be in some kind of small house and, true to her word, they were alone. The place was a tad rustic, especially in comparison to First Order officer’s quarters.

She turned at his approach. They stood in awkward silence for a moment.

“What have you done with the rest of my uniform?” He queried snippily. He was still shirtless, and it made him distinctly uncomfortable.

“I had to cut your shirt off to treat your wound. Your tunic is in the bedroom, but it’s covered in blood.” Her gaze focused on his shoulder. “I should re-bandage that.”

“I think I can manage,” he snapped.

She arched an eyebrow. “You look like you’re about to fall over.”

She crossed the room and gently took his arm. Hux jerked away, but she persisted, pushing him into a chair. He tried not to think about how much better it felt to be sitting down. He absolutely hated feeling weak, and it grated on him to be so easily maneuvered by this slip of a girl. He knew she was a force user, but he hadn’t felt any push into his mind.

She crossed the room and then returned a moment later to set a mug down in front of him. It smelled like tea. Hux eyed it suspiciously.

“It’s just tea,” she said, clearly following his train of thought. “If I wanted you dead, I’d have let you bleed out in the hangar and spared myself the trouble.”

“Why didn’t you?”

She didn’t respond, but disappeared from the room. Hux took a tentative sip of tea. When she returned, she carried an armful of medical supplies and what looked like clothes. Depositing the items on the table, she took the seat next to his and nodded to his shoulder. “May I?”

He gave a sharp nod. He didn’t have to be happy about it, but it would be a nightmare to try to change the bandage himself.

She worked quietly, her hands gentle against his skin and the sensitive wound. She held up a bacta patch, wordlessly communicating her intentions, and Hux exhaled heavily at the relief provided by the fresh medication.

“Stealing from the First Order?” He asked sharply, as she secured the patch to his shoulder with fresh bandages. The medical supplies were quite clearly Order standard issue.

“A whole shuttle,” she replied, with a quirk of her lips.

Hux paused. “You have a First Order shuttle _here_?” With irritation, he realized he’d given zero thought to how they’d arrived in this place.

“Why, planning your escape?” She looked amused, and it made his temper flare. She held out a bundle of clothing. “Might want to put on a shirt first.”

He snatched the clothes from her grip. “Listen, girl-“

“Rey.”

“What?”

She stood, tidying the medical supplies. “My name is Rey.”

“I don’t make a habit of learning the names of Resistance scum,” he sneered.

She looked unimpressed. “The First Order is gone. You do realize that?”

“I wouldn’t be so certain,” he countered.

She shook her head. “The base was razed to the ground. I doubt there were any survivors. Except you.”

“What happened to Ren?” The question passed his lips before he’d had time to think about it. Not that he cared about the other man, but he was strong, and a force user. Surely he’d-

“He’s dead.” The tiniest hint of pain flickered through her eyes as she said it, and then it was gone. She turned on her heel and vanished from the room, leaving Hux to process this new information. Ren was _dead_? And the base was gone. He wondered if the girl was right, or if anyone else had made it out alive. 

He eyed the shirt in his hands skeptically, before carefully pulling it on. At least it was plain and didn’t bear any Resistance insignia. It would have to do.

 

\------------

 

They hardly spoke for the rest of the day. Rey scavenged the neighboring houses for any items of use, returning with an armful of food, medical supplies, and additional clothing. She felt a bit guilty; she’d have to arrange for some kind of compensation for the homeowners once she returned to base. As she’d expected, the place was deserted, and she imagined it would remain that way for some time.

Hux had disappeared into his room, possibly to rest, which he clearly needed. Rey did not check on him. His injuries were not life-threatening, at this point, and she assumed he’d make it known if he needed something. Or, maybe he wouldn’t, but that wasn’t exactly her problem.

She’d managed to find enough food for the two of them for several days, at least. Beyond that, she’d need to figure out what she was going to do. If she’d return to base. What she’d do with Hux. But for the moment, Rey was just focused on what she might make for dinner. She didn’t exactly have a lot of cooking experience, especially with some of the ingredients she’d found in this place. Her life had mostly consisted of rations of one form or another, little preparation required. She didn’t think her companion would be of any help, but she supposed she’d feed him anyway.

She felt his presence before he spoke.

“Cooking?” There was a note of incredulity in his tone.

“We have to eat.”

“You’re planning to stay here,” he realized.

Rey turned to face him. He’d combed his hair back, making him look more like the man she’d first seen in the hangar and less like the patient she’d cared for. His appearance was a sort of armor, she realized. He was wearing the plain shirt she’d given him earlier, along with his black trousers and boots. Even only half in uniform, he looked imposing.

“For a time,” she allowed.

“You wouldn’t prefer to return to your base?”

“I should think you’d be glad for that,” she countered. “If we’d gone there instead, you’d be a prisoner of war.”

“Am I not?” Hux’s expression gave nothing away.

Rey turned back to her food preparation. “You’re not a prisoner here.”

There was a pause. And then: “Until your precious Resistance arrives.”

It suddenly occurred to Rey that he didn’t know. How could he? He’d been unconscious for the entire trip to Qiilura. “They’re not coming.” She neatly chopped a small pile of vegetables, dumping them in a bowl. “They don’t know we’re here. Or that you’re alive.”

“You haven’t told them.” It wasn’t a question, and his voice was very carefully controlled, but Rey thought she could detect a hint of surprise. “Do you _know_ who I am?”

Setting down the knife, Rey faced him once again. “Yes.” He stared at her impassively, possibly disbelievingly. “You’re Hux.”

“Yet you haven’t told the Resistance that I survived.”

Rey shrugged. “The war is over. What would be the point?”

Hux smirked. “You and I both know the answer to that question.”

She knew he was right. She had the General of the First Order standing feet away from her, unarmed and injured, and she hadn’t yet notified _anyone_. What was wrong with her? “Are you trying to convince me to turn you in?”

Hux’s lips pressed into a thin line, but he took a seat at the table. Rey knew he was still feeling the toll from his injury. “Why _here_?”

“I actually think it’s quite nice,” Rey said, glancing around the small kitchen. Hux’s expression was unreadable. “It was nearby. We used this as a rendezvous point on the way to your base, so I knew it had been evacuated. And that the Resistance troops had all pulled out.”

“You don’t want to return to the Resistance,” he said then, with a certainty that put Rey slightly on edge. She hadn’t expected him to read her so easily.

“I need some time to myself.” She turned back to the counter, finding his shrewd gaze rather unnerving. “Just for a little while.”

“And you expect me to believe that you’d let me walk out of here.”

“I can see why you wouldn’t believe it,” Rey acknowledged.

“Take the shuttle?” He pressed.

“If you like.” She paused. “Although you’re probably not well enough to fly just yet.”

She could hear the scowl in his voice. “You absolutely foolish girl.”

Rey frowned. “That’s not a very nice thing to say to someone who saved your life.”

 

\------------

 

Rey took a deep breath, held it. She could feel the breeze brush across her skin. The air was pleasant here, cool, but comfortable. She could feel the force around her, flowing through her, the peace settling over her body and mind. Rey exhaled.

It was hard to find peace these days.

Ironic, wasn’t it, since the war was over. She was in an otherwise deserted settlement with only the decidedly not-conversational General Hux for company. She’d found more quiet here, in a few days, than she’d known in a long time. She had nearly nothing to do and all the time in the world to do it.

And yet, she couldn’t quiet her mind.

Her dreams were plagued with memories - Finn’s eyes on hers as he caught his final breath, Kylo’s as her lightsaber entered his body. The Skywalker line was gone, ended. First Luke, then Leia, now Ben. And Finn, her best friend, was gone, too, entombed in the collapsed First Order rubble. Her attempts at meditation weren’t much better, her thoughts whirling, grief and despair threatening to overtake her in a wave.

Rey struggled to regain her focus.

She was no longer alone. Rey didn’t move from her perch atop a low stone wall, didn’t open her eyes, but she reached out to Hux with the force. He was perhaps ten feet away, his back to her, smoking a cigarette. She pushed further, feeling for his mind. He was so closed off, so controlled, she couldn’t help but wonder what she’d find underneath. And there it was. Simmering anger, wariness, a still unwavering commitment to his beliefs-

“Get out of my head.”

At the sharp tone, Rey withdrew and opened her eyes. Hux was facing her now, his eyes blazing.

“You could feel that?” Admittedly, she’d certainly felt it when Kylo or Snoke had invaded her mind, but they hadn’t been nearly as gentle or tentative as she. And Rey hadn’t been certain if the sensation would be identifiable to a non-force user. Apparently so.

“Obviously.” He took a drag from the cigarette in his hand. “You are not the first force user to try to push their way into my mind.”

Ah. “Ren.”

A single, sharp nod. When he said nothing, Rey faced forward, allowing her eyes to slide closed, easing herself back towards meditation.

“You killed him.”

Her eyes shot open. Hux was watching her, his expression ever-unreadable. “Yes.”

“Just as you killed Snoke.”

“What?” Rey knew her disbelief was written across her face. To her great surprise, Hux actually smiled, although there was something decidedly predatory about it.

“But you didn’t, did you? It was Ren.” Hux shook his head, appearing almost amused. “He told me you’d killed Snoke. When I found him… after.”

Rey blinked. She supposed that made sense. “He killed Snoke. And then we fought the guard, together. He wanted me to stay, to join him-“ why was she telling Hux this? “-but I refused.”

“You believed you could turn him.” It wasn’t a question, and his tone was mocking. “Did you cling to that false hope right up until the end?”

Rey swallowed hard, getting to her feet. “In the _end_ , Kylo made his choice. And I made _mine_.”

“And what of me?” Hux challenged, closing the distance between them. “Are you also laboring under the misguided notion that you saving my life might have swayed my allegiance?”

Rey set her jaw, staring him down. “I sensed the conflict in Kylo. In you? _None_.”

Hux smirked, unkindly. “That’s right. But that’s why we’re here, isn’t it?” He called after her, as she turned to go. “You’re _grieving_ for Kylo Ren, for the fact that you couldn’t save him. And you can’t bring yourself to turn me in. _What_ is it exactly that you’re hoping to find?”

Rey slowly turned back, hating him for his condescension, for his pity. Hating him for being _right_. She forced the anger down. “I’m _here_ because I need _space_ ,” she ground out. “I’m _grieving_ because I watched people that I care about _die._ ” She shouldn’t be letting him see her weakness, tried to stop the words from tumbling out. “Finn-“

“What, FN-2187?” Hux barked a short laugh. His face twisted into a sneer. “He was a traitor.”

Rey drew herself up, meeting his steely gaze with her own. “He was my best friend,” she spat. “And he died a hero. So whatever you have to say about him, you keep it to yourself.”

And then she spun on her heel and entered the house, letting the door bang shut behind her.


	2. Chapter 2

The girl hardly spoke to him after that. Which suited Hux just fine. They neatly avoided each other in the small house, only interacting when it was strictly necessary. But his initial satisfaction at getting under her skin gave way to a general weariness, and Hux decided that it was time he moved on. They’d been here nearly a week. While he was by no means fully recovered, his wound was healing nicely, the pain manageable, and he was well enough to travel. There was no purpose to staying here any longer, in this small house on this planet; no advantage to be gained.

The trouble was, Hux wasn’t entirely sure where he ought to go. The First Order base seemed the obvious place to start, but the girl had told him it was totally destroyed. Best to see for himself, he supposed. If any of his troops had survived and scattered, he might be able to pick up their trail. He doubted any Resistance forces were still there, although he would need to proceed with caution.

His tunic was ruined, despite his best efforts to scrub the blood out of it, but he took it anyway. His uniform was all he had left of the First Order. Well, and the shuttle, which he fully intended to reclaim.

The girl was in the kitchen, seated at the table with a cup of tea.

“I’m going,” he said, by way of explanation. “There’s no point in staying here any longer.”

She glanced up at him. “You know how to fly?”

Hux huffed. “Yes, I know how to fly.”

“Oh.” She seemed to consider that. “Are you sure you’re well enough?”

He scowled. “You don’t need to pretend to be concerned.” He crossed to the door. “I’m taking the shuttle.”

“Fine.”

That gave him pause. He’d expected her to raise some objection. Deciding not to question his luck, he continued out the door.

“Hux!”

He paused, glancing over his shoulder. What _now_?

“Wait,” she said, scrambling to her feet. “One second.” She disappeared from view, and Hux frowned. What was she doing? He was just about to leave anyway, when she reappeared, crossing the kitchen to the door. “Here.”

He glanced down. His blaster was in her outstretched hand. His eyes shot back up to hers.

She shrugged. “I thought you might need it.”

Hux took his blaster, feeling just a bit better for having it in his hand. He didn’t miss the way the girl’s own hand drifted to her lightsaber, as though wondering what exactly he might do with the blaster now that he had it.

He gave a short nod. “Thank you.” And then he turned on his heel and strode out of the house.

 

\------------

 

He found his way to the landing pad with no trouble. Apart from the shuttle, there were a couple of smaller craft, whose owners had clearly taken larger ships in their evacuation. The sight of the shuttle was reassuring. Here, at least, was one small piece of the First Order still standing.

Hux was under no illusions about the difficulties he would face in tracking down any other remnants of the First Order. The last battle had been decisive, the Resistance victorious. He had known that well before he’d encountered Rey in the hangar. And yet, the First Order itself had emerged from the ashes of the Empire. Born just around the start of the Galactic Civil War, Hux had been raised on stories of the Empire’s military might. His entire life had been dedicated to building an army capable of restoring order to the galaxy.

There might well have been survivors from the battle. And there were certainly First Order sympathizers in numerous parts of the galaxy. He only needed to seek them out, and the work could begin anew.

Hux settled into the pilot seat, ready to fire up the shuttle and get the kriff off of this planet, but found his eyes wandering over the green terrain. The cluster of small houses where he’d spent the past week was just visible in the distance, over the trees. He idly wondered if he ought to have offered the girl a lift, then immediately quashed the thought. What a ridiculous notion. Besides, there were other ships here, and she presumably had means to contact the Resistance, should she decide she wanted to leave this place.

Hux had found her, in turns, infuriating, mildly intriguing, and incredibly baffling. She was the enemy, first and foremost, Resistance scum like all the rest. But she’d treated him with a decency that he did not expect. She’d seemed weighed down by her grief, as opposed to the satisfaction - elation even - that he thought she ought to be feeling. Hux had lost his entire army, but he only felt fury, not sadness. He didn’t care about his troops, not in a personal sense. He cared about the First Order, about the end goal.

The anger of being defeated at the hands of the Resistance might have driven him to destroy the girl; it had, in fact, when he’d spotted her in the hangar. And after, he’d been wounded and unarmed. Even with his blaster, he knew better than to believe he could take her in a straight fight, despite her relatively small size. But he hadn’t wanted to, even at her most infuriating. She’d been kind to him, a sort of interaction that was entirely unfamiliar. And she’d saved his life, for reasons he still couldn’t fathom. And now he was abandoning her on a deserted planet, left alone with her grief.

He was halfway through the take off procedure. His eyes drifted again to the small house. _Dammit_.

 

\------------

 

She actually jumped when he burst through the door, tossing his blaster on the kitchen table.

“Why did you save my life?”

She was on her feet now, clearly unsettled by his sudden reappearance. “I-“

“And don’t deflect,” he continued. “You keep avoiding the question. You could have killed me, or left me there to die. But you didn’t. Why?”

The girl - Rey - sank back into her chair. “I was tired of death,” she admitted quietly. “I had just…fought Kylo, and I was just…tired of it.”

Hux dropped into the seat opposite her. The walk to and from the landing pad was about the most exercise he’d had all week. His shoulder was registering its objection. “You wouldn’t have had to do anything,” he pointed out. “Except leave me there.”

“I know.” She closed her eyes, exhaled, opened her eyes again to meet his. “But I couldn’t. It wasn’t planned.”

“How lucky for me,” he muttered, aware of how bitter he sounded.

She noticed, too. “You don’t sound particularly happy about it.” His dark look was met with one of exasperation. “Are you _actually_ annoyed that I saved your life?”

“Not much of a life,” he countered. “Not anymore.” And it was true. He’d dedicated his life to the First Order. He wasn’t entirely sure what he would do without it.

“You never expected to outlive the First Order,” she realized. “You don’t have anywhere to go.”

Hux glared. Did she really have to make him sound quite so pathetic? “There are still First Order sympathizers in the galaxy,” he retorted stiffly.

“Is that where you planned to go? To find them?”

“Yes.”

Rey’s brow furrowed. “Are you still leaving today?”

Hux glanced around the kitchen, then back at the girl. “No, I suppose not.”

 

\------------

 

Rey jolted from sleep, the last remnants of her dream flashing through her mind. She wondered if she’d ever sleep a solid night again, without blaster fire and shouts of pain echoing in her memory. Sitting up, she rubbed a hand across her face, further sleep slipping out of her grasp. Well, as long as she was up, she might as well get a drink of water.

She left the lights off, navigating her way through the dark house with a comfortable ease. An ease which didn’t prevent her from a near collision with Hux, as she returned to her room and he stepped out of the refresher.

“Sorry,” she exclaimed, as they both drew up short.

He was shirtless, the now-smaller bandage on his shoulder just visible in the dim light. In fact, he was wearing nothing but a pair of sleep pants, slung low on his hips. Rey had never before seen him completely out of uniform. Standing close and both barefoot, she was for the first time aware of how much taller than her he actually was. Peering up at his face, she realized with a jolt that she’d been staring.

Hux was staring right back.

“I’ll just-uh-“ Rey managed, gesturing vaguely in the direction of the bedroom she’d taken as her own.

Neither of them moved.

She’d never been this close to him before, and she could almost feel the heat radiating from his body. His hair was in disarray, falling over his forehead instead of combed back like he seemed to prefer it. It made him look less severe, more approachable, more attractive. Rey blinked. She’d never thought about him that way, never thought about _anyone_ that way, for that matter.

Without stopping to think about whether it was a good idea, Rey went up on her tiptoes and pressed her lips to his. Hux didn’t move. Pulling away, she was grateful for the dim light that hid the flush rising to her cheeks. She was almost certain he could hear her heart hammering in her chest.

“Sorry,” she said again, turning away. “I’ll just-“

“Wait.” His voice was gentle, softer than she’d ever heard it, and so were the hands that settled lightly on her waist. Rey shivered at the warmth of his fingers through her shirt. She turned back to face him fully, and one of his hands left her waist to gently cup her cheek. He tipped her face up and brought his lips to hers.

The kiss turned heated in seconds, Hux’s tongue delving into her mouth. Rey, who had not so much as kissed anyone in her life, clung to his good shoulder - ever mindful of the injured one - and tried to keep her knees from giving out. After a moment, she experimentally probed with her own tongue, exploring his mouth in turn, and swallowed his grunt of pleasure.

She backed up, pulling him with her, and they tumbled over the threshold into her room, still kissing. She kept going until the back of her knees hit the bed, and she sank down onto the mattress, Hux on top of her. His slight frame was all lean, sinewy muscle, and Rey found she relished in the sensation of his weight pressing her into the bed. She knew she could easily throw him across the room if she wanted to.

She didn’t want to.

His hands had found their way up her tank, eliciting shivers wherever they went, and she broke the kiss long enough for him to pull it off over her head. The feeling of skin on skin sent a jolt through her, and she raked her nails lightly over the warm contours of his back. Mouth leaving hers, he kissed down the column of her throat, nipping at her collarbone.

Rey buried a hand in his surprisingly soft hair, as he continued his path down her body, his hot mouth leaving a blazing trail in its wake. How she wanted this. She wanted _more_. Thankfully, he was obliging without her having to ask, his hands and lips seemingly everywhere. Reaching the waistband of her sleep pants, he dipped his fingers beneath and lifted his head to meet her eyes. She could only just make out his features in the darkness. At her nod, he shucked off her sleep pants, tossing them to the floor.

His fingers trailed up the inside of her thigh, mouth brushing over her bare hip, and Rey thought she probably ought to say something.

“Wait, Hux.” She pressed a palm to his shoulder, and he lifted his head again. “I haven’t- I mean, I’ve never-“ Rey wasn’t accustomed to being quite so without words.

Hux paused. He crawled his way back up her body, until his face was hovering over hers. “You haven’t had sex before,” he realized.

“No,” Rey whispered, blushing to the roots of her hair. She wondered if he could see it in the dark. Hopefully not.

“We can stop,” he offered, and Rey started in surprise. She hadn’t expected him to be particularly concerned with her comfort level.

She shook her head. “No, it’s fine.”

“Are you sure, Rey?” He peered at her in the darkness, and she realized that it was the first time he’d ever used her name.

Rey nodded. “Yes. Yes, I’m sure. _Please,_ don’t stop.”

He smirked, and then he kissed her. Rey wasn’t sure if he intended it to be reassuring - not a word she would ever associate with him otherwise -, but her body all but melted against his. It was a relief to feel something, _anything_ other than the empty ache that had haunted her since the final battle. Hux was all fire, and warm, comforting weight, and Rey had the peculiar feeling that he was the only solid thing to cling to as everything else washed away.

 

\------------

 

When Rey woke, the first thing she was aware of was that she’d slept without dreaming. The second was that there was a warm body pressed against her back. She didn’t need her vision, nor the Force, to know that it was Hux and that they were both naked.

_Well_.

She cautiously opened her eyes. Sunlight filtered in through the partially covered window, casting the room in a warm glow. Rey guessed it was mid-morning, later than she usually rose, but - well - they’d been up rather late last night.

In the heat of the moment, she’d not stopped to think about any of the implications of what they were doing. She’d allowed all of her buried emotions to give way to desire, and she’d enjoyed every second of it. In her twenty-two years of life, Rey had never before even considered doing such a thing. She knew the Jedi of old were forbidden from romantic attachment, but that wasn’t what had stopped her. There wasn’t a Jedi Order, not _really_ , not anymore. And Rey certainly hadn’t taken any kind of vows. She’d simply never really thought about it. She’d been focused on her training, on fighting in the war. And the men she was close to? Finn - her heart _ached_ \- her best friend. Poe, for all of his good looks and teasing flirtation, something of an older brother. They were everything to her and, yet, never that.

And then Hux. _Hux_. She hadn’t thought of him that way, either, until they were standing in the dark, with too little clothing on between them, and Rey hadn’t been able to think of anything she wanted more than his body fitted against hers. There had been some pain, at first, but it had passed quickly, and Hux had been a more considerate lover than she would have guessed. 

Rey sighed, suppressing the urge to shift position for fear of waking her companion. What was she supposed to say to him _now_? What had felt safe and right in the darkness was looking increasingly problematic in the morning light. They were enemies. He’d tried to kill _her_ , before she very nearly killed _him_. While they had settled into a begrudging sort of coexistence, Rey knew it a mistake to believe they could ever be on the same side. In Hux, she sensed no remorse, only resolve, although she hadn’t again tried to read his mind since that first time. Just yesterday, he’d been ready to leave and seek out First Order sympathizers. Eventually, she would need to return to the Resistance.

Rey carefully eased herself out of bed, gathering her sleep clothes from the floor. At the doorway, she paused, glancing back. Hux’s eyes were still closed.

When she returned from the refresher, he was gone.

 

\------------

 

Hux hadn’t gone far. He stood on the porch in the cool morning air, clad only in his sleep pants, smoking a cigarette. He’d been awake before Rey, a lifetime of military service robbing him of the ability to sleep in. When she went to the refresher, he’d taken the opportunity to slip from the room.

He hadn’t expected the direction the previous night had gone in, but had found he had no objections. Rey was certainly attractive, although he hadn’t previously given it much thought, and the sex was fantastic. He’d felt a moment of hesitation when she’d confessed to being a virgin. She was easily ten years his junior, if not more, and perhaps he shouldn’t have - well, it was too late now. He’d asked, she’d agreed, and she was certainly capable of making up her own mind.

Then there was the issue of her being with the Resistance. It didn’t bother him as much as it should have. Hux had engaged in plenty of casual sex - in fact, it was the _only_ kind he’d ever had - and he didn’t see why this should have to be any different. Admittedly, his previous partners had always been First Order, or at the very least loyal to. He supposed it hardly mattered now.

A flare of anger rose up at the thought. He forced it down.

He had nearly finished the cigarette, when the creak of the door alerted him to Rey emerging on to the porch. She was dressed, her hair up in its customary series of buns, and she carried her lightsaber. She offered Hux a short nod, not quite meeting his eyes, and then jogged down the steps and some distance away. He watched as she activated the saber, stood still for a long moment, and then swung the blade.

Hux had never given much thought to lightsabers. It seemed an unnecessarily intricate and flashy method of combat. Admittedly, his opinion on the matter probably had a lot to do with his opinion of Ren. He’d certainly never watched the man train, although he’d seen him fight on more than one occasion.

Rey, on the other hand, was breathtaking. She was agile and sure-footed, spinning, and jumping, and kicking, while her lightsaber never stopped moving. As someone who had been trained in hand-to-hand combat, Hux could appreciate the importance of good form. She spun the lightsaber in her hand, then up over her head, as she moved in a circle. The blade sliced through the air, sparkling even against the clear sky. There was something…almost elegant, about the way she moved, if no less deadly. She clearly took her training seriously, as evident from the sight before him as much as it was from the muscle deceptively winding its way through her frame. The memory of her body beneath his flashed through his mind unbidden.

Hux tore his eyes away from Rey and went inside to dress.

 

**\------------**

 

They spoke little throughout the day, even when they took their evening meal together, as they often did. Never one for unnecessary conversation, Hux didn’t mind the quiet. Typically it was Rey who made some effort, and he idly wondered if she was regretting the night before. Not that it mattered. It would happen again, or it wouldn’t, and either suited him just fine.

He retired to his room after eating. He’d considered leaving again today, but had decided against it. What was a few more days? There was no particular rush, especially as he still wasn’t entirely certain where he ought to go. He would not stay here indefinitely, of that he was certain, however increasingly tolerable Rey’s company was proving to be. Sooner or later, someone would return here. It wouldn’t exactly do to continue living off the charity of unknowing strangers, not to mention he had business to attend to. He was beginning to get antsy; he’d never lived a life of leisure and was not at all convinced he was suited for it.

He’d left his door open, and a movement in the hallway caught his attention. He glanced up to see Rey hovering in between his door and her own, her eyes on him. He held her gaze, and she stared back, unblinking. Hux crossed to the doorway, allowing his eyes to wander appreciatively over her gentle curves. Lifting his eyes back to hers, he found she was still watching him, an unreadable expression on her face. Last night, she had taken the initiative. Tonight, he was apparently going to have to make the first move.

She’d let down her hair, and it tumbled around her shoulders. He stepped near enough that he could brush it back from her face, letting his hand trail over her shoulder, down her arm, until he entwined his fingers with hers. He gave a gentle, experimental tug, and she followed willingly until they were chest to chest. Taking her face in his hands, he kissed her.

Almost immediately, she pressed closer to him, arms sliding around his waist. He deepened the kiss, their tongues battling for control, and she deftly untucked his shirt, her cool hands slipping underneath to rest against his skin. They were both slightly breathless when they broke apart, breathing in unison for a long moment.

Hux stepped back into his room, and Rey followed, never losing contact with him. At the bed, he sat back and pulled her after him, until she was straddling his lap. Her lips landed on his again, her hands in his hair, and his wandered up her shirt and then down to her legs, feeling the strength of her thighs where she gripped him. Rey rolled her hips into his and he bit back the moan, smirking at her squeak of surprise when he yanked her shirt off over her head. No sooner had her shirt hit the floor than she'd wrestled his off and scooted closer until they were flush from hip to shoulder.

With a shift of her weight, Rey pushed him on to his back, angling her head to kiss his neck. Hux made an appreciative sound in the back of his throat, squeezing the backs of her thighs and slowly grinding up into her. Rey ventured lower, following a path not dissimilar to one he’d mapped on her body the night before. When she tentatively flicked a tongue over his nipple, Hux all but growled, getting an arm around her hips and deftly flipping them over. Catching her hands in his, he pressed them to the bed, pinning her beneath him. Rey’s eyes narrowed, and he expected retaliation. She arched her body into his, kissing him fiercely, and Hux promptly abandoned the display of dominance in favor of kissing her back.

 

\------------

 

Rey didn’t want to move. Hux was on top of her, cradled in between her thighs. Her hand was in his hair, ever so lightly scratching at his scalp in a way that he seemed to like. His face was pressed against her neck, and he occasionally dropped light, lazy kisses on her skin.

The previous night, they’d almost immediately fallen asleep after sex, side by side and only just touching. Tonight, they both seemed content to stay entwined a bit longer. In many ways, it was perhaps the most intimate thing they’d done.

As though he had sensed her thoughts, Hux shifted off of her and on to his side. Rey turned her head to meet his eyes.

“Do you want me to go?”

Hux propped his head up on his hand, peering down at her. “I don’t make a habit of kicking women out of my bed after sex.”

“Do you do this sort of thing often?” Rey found herself asking.

A faint smirk played around the edges of his mouth. “I think it’s safe to say you’re the first member of the Resistance I’ve slept with,” he deadpanned.

Rey rolled her eyes. “You know what I mean,” she retorted, lightly punching at his good shoulder. In truth, the playful banter pleased her. Perhaps they were making progress after all.

“Not often,” he obliged her. “But I have before, yes.”

“Ever anyone serious?” Rey had no idea what had possessed her to ask him such a personal question. Judging by the expression on his face, he was inclined to agree. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to pry.”

Hux’s head dropped back on to the pillow. “My work hardly left time for anything casual, much less a relationship.”

Rey struggled to imagine Hux in a relationship. Emotions certainly weren’t his strong suit. “Traditionally, the Jedi weren’t allowed romantic relationships,” Rey shared, in lieu of vocalizing that aloud. “But now-“ She trailed off.

“Are you the last?” He asked quietly. Glancing towards him, Rey found his blue eyes watching her carefully.

“No.” She shook her head. “There are others. Someday, I think perhaps I’d like to find them.”

They lapsed into silence. A comfortable, easy silence, unlike the awkward ones they’d sometimes shared in their first days here.

“Where are you from?” She asked suddenly. “Or were you actually born on a Star Destroyer?”

Hux snorted. “No, I was not born on a Star Destroyer. Though why it matters to you, I have no idea.”

Rey shrugged. “Just curious.”

“I was born on Arkanis.”

She considered that. “I’ve never been there. What’s it like?”

“Rainy.”

“So, basically the opposite of Jakku.”

Hux huffed what might have been a quiet laugh. “Yes.”

“Have you been there? To Jakku?”

He nodded. “I have.”

“I grew up there.” Rey shivered, remembering the long days scavenging amongst the Imperial wreckages, the long nights hoping for her family to return. “All I knew was desert. The first place I went when I left was Takodana, and I’d never seen so much green in my entire life.”

“Jakku’s not particularly known for its trees,” Hux agreed. “Not anymore.”

They again fell into silence. Rey turned on her side and scooted closer to press her face against his chest. After a moment, his arm settled around her waist, and his chin came to rest atop her head.

Rey drifted into an easy sleep and dreamed of rain.

 

\------------

 

“Do you have family?”

The question came out of nowhere, on a lazy early morning. They were in Rey’s bed, Hux on his back, the girl tucked into his side. He’d thought she’d fallen back asleep.

“Not anymore.” They’d spent four consecutive nights together now, in his room or hers. The sex was still great, and even simply lying together in bed was surprisingly pleasant. Increasingly, Hux found he enjoyed her company. This getting-to-know-you bit, though, he could definitely do without.

Rey, predictably, was persistent. “Do you remember them?”

“Yes.” Unfortunately.

She lifted her head, peering into his eyes. Expectantly. Hux bit back the groan. “My father was the Commandant of the Imperial Academy on Arkanis.”

“Oh.” Her head settled back against his shoulder. “Military family, I might have guessed.”

“Mm.”

“I don’t remember my family,” she offered then. “They left me on Jakku and never came back.”

So family was a touchy spot for both of them, it seemed.

“Did you attend the Academy?” She asked, when he said nothing.

“No.” Hux sighed. “Arkanis fell to the New Republic during the Galactic Civil War. I was evacuated with my father.”

“How old were you?”

“Five.”

“Where did you go?” She sounded genuinely interested in his answers, which Hux found baffling.

“Jakku, actually.” She blinked up at him in surprise. “Briefly. And then the Unknown Regions.”

“I traveled to the Unknown Regions once.” Rey fell silent for a long moment, as though lost in a memory. “What happened to your father?”

“He’s dead.” Hux did not elaborate. He didn’t imagine she’d react well to his involvement in his father’s death, given her obvious longing for her own family. Why he was bothering to consider her feelings was rather beyond him.

“The First Order formed in the Unknown Regions,” she mused. “That was your childhood, wasn’t it? Building the First Order?”

“Yes.”

“Do you regret any of it?”

Hux knew the answer she wanted. But he wasn’t going to tell her anything other than the truth. “No.”

Rey lifted her head again at that. “You blew up a planet,” she accused, eyes flashing. “You murdered an entire system of people.”

“Yes.”

She considered him for several seconds. “You don’t feel anything, do you?”

“I _feel_ that I did what was necessary to bring order to the galaxy,” he retorted.

“And how’s that working out for you?” She snapped.

Hux’s eyes narrowed at that, but his anger deflated just as quickly, as Rey dropped her chin to her chest, taking a deep breath.

“I don’t actually want to fight with you,” she whispered. “I just don’t know how to reconcile…” She trailed off.

Hux slid a hand under her chin, tipping her face up until their eyes met. “Then don’t,” he said, as though it was that simple. “I’m not going to apologize for who I am, Rey. You said it yourself, the First Order has been my entire life. It’s the only thing I’ve ever known.”

Her eyes softened at that. Perhaps it made it easier for her, to see him as a product of his circumstances. Hux knew it didn’t change anything. It didn’t change his commitment to the First Order, his willingness to do whatever it took, however ruthless, to achieve his goals.

He brushed the pad of his thumb across her cheekbone, then down over her lips, and her eyes fluttered closed. He moved his hand to the back of her neck, sitting up just enough to press his lips to hers. She kissed him back immediately, and he pulled her back down to the bed, never breaking the kiss.

He couldn’t change things. Wouldn’t want to. This would have to be enough.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A slightly shorter chapter, but the next (last?!) chapter will be longer...

Rey wasn’t entirely sure how it had happened, but Hux had snuck up on her - well, not _really_ , she’d sensed him approach - while she had been preparing them something to eat, and - _suddenly_ \- they were making out in the kitchen. Her back was against the counter, her lips fused to his, the food all but forgotten.

They jumped apart at the loud rumbling overhead. An incoming ship. Rey would recognize the sound of those engines anywhere. She hurried to the door, Hux on her heels, and peered up at the sky. The Millennium Falcon shot overhead, heading for the landing pad.

“The Resistance,” her companion growled, close behind her.

“It’s not,” Rey objected. “I mean, it is. But it’s just my friends.” She reached out with the Force, just to be certain, easily finding the familiar signals. “They’re probably just making sure I’m okay.”

“How did they find you?” Hux strode back into the middle of the kitchen, and Rey turned, following. “Have you told them where we are?”

“No!” Rey shook her head. “Hux, I haven’t been in contact with anyone since we’ve been here. I have a tracker-“ his eyes narrowed. “But I wasn’t expecting them to use it. I told Poe I needed some time.”

Hux’s lips pressed into a thin line.

“Look, it’ll be fine, okay?” She tried to reassure him. “I’ll speak to Poe, I’ll explain everything, he’ll understand-“

“He won’t.”

“Or I don’t even need to tell him you’re here,” Rey plowed on, undeterred. “You should just stay here, and I’ll get him to leave-“

“You expect me to hide from the Resistance?” Hux’s tone was mocking. “Not likely.”

“Okay, well-“

But Hux had apparently had enough of her ideas, as he turned on his heel and left the room. Rey sighed, turning to brace her hands against the counter, watching from the window as the Falcon made its final descent. They’d come to check on her. Poe, and Chewie, and - she assumed - BB-8. And Hux was right, they wouldn’t understand. But she _had_ to try. She couldn’t just hand Hux over to them, after everything. Sure, he was guilty of all they’d accuse him of, and unrepentant to boot, but… things had _changed_. In the galaxy, with the war being over. And in this tiny house, between the two of them.

She felt his returned presence, and Hux silently crossed the room to stand directly behind her.

“I’ll fix this,” she whispered, not turning around. “Poe is my friend, I’ll talk to him. I can _fix_ this.”

Hux sighed. He ran a hand over her head, and she instinctively leaned into the touch. “I believe that you want to.”

Later, Rey wondered how she hadn’t sensed it. Were his thoughts that well-shielded, was she that distracted by imagining how she might convince Poe, had she come to trust him that much, so fast, that she’d let her guard down?

Later, Rey knew that she should have seen it coming.

Something heavy slammed into the side of her head, and everything went black.

 

\------------

 

When Poe Dameron, his droid, and - good grief, was that a Wookiee? - emerged into the clearing, Hux was standing over Rey’s prone form, blaster in hand. He’d had precious little time to put his plan into action, but he was nothing if not a tactician. Ideally, he’d keep his leverage with him until he reached safety, that safety coming in the form of the First Order shuttle on the landing pad, but he knew he couldn’t carry her that far with his still healing shoulder. There being nothing he could use to move her on, he’d had to improvise. This is what he got for being stupid enough to stick around, instead of taking off the first second he’d been able. Hux had felt the tiniest twinge of guilt at knocking Rey out, but it couldn’t be helped. It was for the best, anyway. She’d be fine, and he’d be long gone.

Dameron and the Wookiee both had weapons drawn the second they spotted him, the former exclaiming a slightly strangled cry of “Rey!”.

“Don’t worry, she’s still alive.” Hux rested the barrel of his blaster against the girl’s head, without shifting his gaze from the other two. She was lying on a stone wall about waist height; he hardly had to move to do it. “And she’ll stay that way, provided you do exactly as I say. Starting with: lower your weapons.”

Dameron and the Wookiee exchanged a look, although neither sets of eyes fully left Hux.

“Or I can shoot her in the head,” Hux offered. “Your choice.” He was banking on the assumption that Rey was important to them. He hoped he was correct.

He was. Both guns lowered.

“What do you want, Hux?” Dameron sounded weary.

“My freedom,” Hux said simply. “There’s a First Order Shuttle on the landing pad. I intend to take it. And I expect to be unhindered in leaving.”

“You expect us to just let you go?” Dameron raised an eyebrow.

Hux pressed the blaster harder against Rey’s skin. “If you want her to live.”

The Wookiee roared at that, and the droid emitted an angry string of beeps.

“Okay, okay,” Dameron said quickly, his eyes tracking the movements of Hux’s blaster. “No need to be hasty.”

“Time is of the essence, _Commander_.” Hux didn’t try to hide the derision in his tone. “Here is what’s going to happen: you’re both going to toss your weapons over that wall there-“ He tilted his head to indicate the location in question - “and then approach slowly from this side-“ Another nod - “While I move towards the landing pad.”

Following his instructions would require them to move a considerable distance from their weapons in order to reach Rey. He was taking a calculated risk, allowing them to secure her safety before he was aboard the shuttle. But by the time they reached her and then returned to their weapons, he’d be well into the forest and under considerable cover.

“How do we know you won’t shoot us once we’re unarmed?” Dameron challenged, nonetheless stepping towards the designated wall. “Or that Rey really is okay, for that matter?”

“You’re just going to have to take my word for it.”

Dameron didn’t look impressed, but he tossed his blaster over the wall. The Wookiee’s weapon followed suit. Hux lifted his blaster from Rey’s head, watching as the Resistance pilot huffed out a breath of relief.

“One last thing,” Dameron said. “How’d you get off the base?”

Hux smirked. “You can ask her,” he gestured to Rey. “When she wakes up. And in case you have any ill-conceived ideas of taking me down once I’ve stepped away from her,” he continued conversationally. “You should know that I trained as a sharpshooter. I’d hate for your precious Jedi to be hit in the crossfire.”

A flicker of anger crossed Dameron’s face, but he nodded. At Hux’s signal, the group began their slow circle, the Resistance trio moving closer to Rey, while Hux moved away.

As soon as they reached Rey, Dameron and the Wookiee turned all their attention to trying to rouse her, Hux all but forgotten. He backed steadily into the cover of the trees. When they’d disappeared from view, he spun on his heel, picking up his pace as he covered the remaining distance.

They could still follow him yet.

 

\------------

 

Rey came to amidst a cacophony of noise and a throbbing in her temple. The noise shifted and solidified into three distinct sounds - BB-8’s worried chirping, Chewie’s roar and Poe’s increasingly frantic voice.

Her eyes shot open.

Poe and Chewie were hovering over her, and they both made an audible noise of relief at seeing her awake. She couldn’t see BB-8, but the droid’s continuous beeping came from just beneath her ear.

“She’s okay, buddy,” Poe reassured the droid. “Relax.” Then to Rey: “Are you alright?”

Rey sat up, with Poe’s steadying hand on her arm. “I think so, just a headache.” The reason for said headache suddenly came to mind, and she glanced around quickly, ignoring the increased jolt of pain. Without intending to, she reached out with her mind. Searching. “Where’s Hux?”

Poe frowned. “On his way to the landing pad. He _negotiated_ his freedom in exchange for your life.”

Rey’s eyes snapped to his. “ _What?”_ Her inquiring mind found Hux, nearly to the landing pad.

“He threatened to shoot you if we didn’t let him go,” Poe explained. Chewie’s huff let Rey know exactly what the Wookiee thought of that. “I’m so sorry, Rey. If I’d known he’d taken you hostage, I would’ve come sooner.”

“He wouldn’t have shot me.” The words tumbled out before she’d thought about their audience. Poe thought she’d been the General’s hostage this entire time - _if only he knew_ \- but that wasn’t the case. He’d knocked her out, yes, but _surely_ -

Poe raised an eyebrow. “Of course he would have, Rey, the man is ruthless. And I wasn’t going to take any chances when he had a blaster to your head.”

He’d what? Held a blaster to her head? Used her as leverage to get away? It was the kind of cold-hearted ploy she expected from General Hux of the First Order, but not from _her_ Hux, the one she’d been naked in bed with this morning, who had been kissing her in the kitchen just a short while ago when the Falcon flew overhead. She’d offered to vouch for him, to _lie_ for him, and _this_ is what he did?

Rey leapt to her feet, ignoring Poe’s exclamation of concern and BB-8’s frantic beeping. Reaching out her mind, she found her lightsaber, tucked away in her room in the house. With a mental tug, it zoomed from its place, out the front door, and into her hand.

Poe scrambled to his feet beside her. “Rey, what are you-“

He was _not_ getting away with this.

Ignoring the commotion around her, Rey took off for the woods at a dead run.

 

\------------

 

She emerged onto the landing pad just as Hux was lowering the ramp of the shuttle. If she was mildly surprised she’d caught up to him so quickly, she wasn’t about to question it. She’d left Poe and Chewie in the clearing, but knew they wouldn’t be far behind.

“HUX!”

He spun on his heel at her bellow, blaster at the ready. Rey’s lightsaber was in her hand, unactivated.

“Is it true?” She spat. “Did you really just knock me unconscious and threaten my life in order to _escape_?”

Hux’s face was impassive, stone-cold. “You were a means to an end.”

Rey wondered if he meant only in that moment, or all of it. She shoved the emotion down. “Do you want to shoot me, Hux? Here I am.” She laughed coldly. “Go ahead.”

“I’m leaving,” he said sharply. “There’s no other way for this to end.”

“Rey!” That was Poe, as he and Chewie reached the landing pad. Hux’s eyes narrowed.

She couldn’t see him, but Rey _felt_ Poe raise his blaster, at the same time that Hux’s weapon swiveled to aim at the pilot. It was impossible to tell who fired first, but time seemed to slow down as the blaster fire crossed the empty air. Rey knew that Hux had an advantage in the cover of the shuttle, and she knew - without a shred of doubt - that the General wouldn’t miss.

The blaster bolts stopped in midair. Rey approached them, hand outstretched, and glanced first to Poe, and then Hux. They both looked vaguely startled. What would she do now? She knew what Poe would expect: that she would allow his shot to find its mark, or that she would disarm and/or kill Hux herself. And she could do that. Or she could wave their blaster fire away and refuse to allow them to keep fighting. That would give Hux the opportunity to get away.

She couldn’t just let him escape. Not after what he’d done. But disarming Hux, giving Poe the upper hand, would likely result in Hux dying right here. Right in front of her.

With a flick of her mind, Rey cast Poe’s shot aside. She ignored his protest. She had eyes only for Hux, as she stepped in front of the shimmering bolt from his blaster. 

_There’s no other way for this to end_.

Rey dropped her hand, and the bolt shot forward through the air. The impact to her shoulder sent her stumbling back, but she remained on her feet. The searing pain hit a second later, slicing through her in a brilliant flash of white. She heard Chewie’s roar, and Poe’s shout, dim over the roaring in her ears. As her knees hit the hard ground, there was someone right in front of her; blue eyes, with pupils blown wide, staring into hers. They were the last thing she saw before once again succumbing to darkness.

 

\------------

  
****

This time, Rey awoke to quiet. Well, almost quiet. The equipment nearby gave off a low hum, and she could make out the faint creaking of a droid moving around. She knew she was in med bay. She opened her eyes. _Resistance_ med bay. Her shoulder ached, but nothing like the sharp pain of before. A quick glance to the side showed it bandaged, the edge of a bacta patch just visible beneath the white cloth. 

A flash of memory, of tending to Hux’s own shoulder wound in the shuttle, what felt like ages ago. Rey lifted herself on to one elbow, trying to take in her surroundings. Immediately, a metal hand was on her shoulder, easing her back into the mattress.

“Do not try to move.” The medical droid peered down at her. “You must rest.”

Rey wanted to object, but found she didn’t have the strength to argue. Her head was still sore, and the sheets felt cool and comfortable against her skin. “But I’ll be fine?” She asked instead.

“Yes,” the droid stated, matter of fact. “Your shoulder wound is healing well. The head injury is only a bump, no concussion.”

Rey nodded, and the droid stepped away. The door opened with a swish, revealing Poe. Rey felt an odd mixture of guilt and relief at the sight of him.

“Rey.” He crossed to her side quickly, brow etched with concern. “Thank kriff you’re aright.”

“I’m fine, Poe.” She lifted a hand, catching the edge of his jacket between her fingers.

“You were _shot_ ,” he protested, his expression darkening. “What were you _thinking_ , letting him shoot you?!”

“He was aiming for _you_ ,” Rey objected feebly, dodging the greater question.

Poe wasn’t having it. “You’d stopped the blaster fire, Rey. Don’t try to tell me you couldn’t have disarmed him.”

Rey pressed her lips together, looking away. How could she explain?

“What _happened_ on that planet?” Poe’s voice had lowered, though the intensity hadn’t wavered.

“Commander.” That was the droid, approaching from across the room and saving Rey from having to formulate a response. “Your questions will have to wait. My patient needs to rest.”

Poe frowned, but nodded. “Yeah, okay.” To Rey: “I’ll come see you later.” He stepped away from the bed, then paused, turning back. “I’m really glad you’re okay.”

Rey managed a small smile. “Thanks.” He’d reached the door when she spoke again, finally voicing the question that had been forcing its way through her mind. “Poe? What happened to Hux?”

 

\------------

 

Hux had survived the fiasco on the landing pad, though he very nearly wished he hadn’t. His head was pounding - _again_ \- this time due to a swipe from the Wookiee, which had come just seconds after he’d dropped to his knees in front of the injured Rey and had knocked him out cold. He’d come to on the way to Resistance HQ, already in restraints. Rey had been unconscious across from him, blood-stained and out of reach, being tended to by Dameron. It had been the longest flight of Hux’s life.

Now, he was in a cell. 

The door slid open, and Dameron entered, carrying a chair. Hux hadn’t had any visitors, save the junior officer who delivered his food, since he’d been placed in the cell some twelve hours earlier.

“General.” Dameron set the chair on the floor and dropped into it, gesturing at the other chair in the room. It was one of very few pieces of furniture in the sparse cell.

After appraising the other man for a long moment, Hux stood from the cot and took the chair. “Commander.”

For another long moment, they held gazes, sizing each other up. Hux knew Dameron by reputation, and he’d recognized him immediately when he’d arrived on Qiilura. But he’d never met the man before today. Or yesterday, technically.

Dameron broke the silence. “Let’s start where we left off. How did you get off the base?”

Hux smirked. “I believe I told you to ask the girl that question.”

Dameron’s expression darkened. “Well, I’ve been kicked out of med bay until she gets some more rest. So that leaves you.”

“She has survived.” It wasn’t exactly a question, and Hux was careful to keep any inflection from his voice.

“You were hoping she hadn’t?” Dameron’s voice was even, but he wasn’t quite as skilled at hiding his reactions as Hux.

“I wasn’t shooting at her,” he offered.

“No, I know.” Dameron shook his head in what looked like exasperation. “She stepped into the line of fire. Maybe you can tell me why she did _that_?”

“No.” And he couldn’t. Hux honestly had no idea what had possessed Rey to do such a thing.

“Is there anything you _can_ tell me?”

“What are you hoping for, Commander?” Hux inquired, spreading his hands in a questioning gesture. “I survived the battle, went to Qiilura to recover.”

“On the shuttle,” Dameron interjected, and it sounded like an accusation. “You were on the shuttle with Rey, there’s no other way you could’ve gotten to Qiilura. You took her hostage, didn’t you? You’d been holding her hostage the entire time-“

“And how do you imagine I might have done _that_?” Hux retorted, tone sharp. “She is a force user, a skilled fighter. Do you honestly believe that I could have held her hostage for two weeks?”

Dameron considered that. “Then _what_ happened,” he demanded.

Hux leaned back in his chair. “I suggest you ask Rey, Commander.”

Dameron blinked, and then sighed. “Fine.” He straightened. “Then there is the matter of what to do with you.”

“Hm.” Hux hummed noncommittally.

“Is there anything you’d like to say in your defense?”

Hux gave Dameron a withering look. “Are you expecting me to plead for my life? I know how this works.”

“Then you’ll know that there is a protocol to follow,” Dameron countered. “Should you, say, express remorse for your previous actions, that would be taken into consideration.”

Hux actually snorted. “I am the highest ranking officer in the First Order,” he stated. “Nothing I say now will change my fate, even if I were so inclined.”

“Our leadership is calling for your execution.”

“I’m not surprised.”

Dameron folded his arms. “You’re resigned to it. Not even remotely tempted to defend yourself?”

Hux leveled a stare at the pilot. “My loyalty is to the First Order.”

“The First Order is dead.”

“And I, with it.” Hux smirked. “So what will it be, Commander? Firing squad?”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The last chapter!! I've become so fond of these two, and this has been such fun to write. Thank you to everyone who has read and commented, I hope you like how it turns out!

“You need to tell me what happened on Qiilura.”

Rey had been released to her quarters after two long days in med bay. She was propped up on her bed, pillow supporting her still healing shoulder. Poe sat backwards on a chair a few feet away, and the expression on his face suggested he wasn’t going anywhere until she complied.

She was quiet for a long moment. “I don’t know how to explain,” she admitted finally.

Poe sighed. “Just tell me the truth, Rey. I know _something_ happened, I just don’t know quite _what_.”

“Hux didn’t tell you?” She questioned. “I know you’ve interrogated him.”

“I have,” Poe agreed. “He told me to ask _you_.”

Rey blinked at that. She supposed she shouldn’t be surprised. Hux was a fiercely private man; she couldn’t blame him for not wanting to tell-all to Poe. He was leaving it up to her, then. He had to know she’d tell Poe the truth. Didn’t he? Truth be told, Rey knew Poe was beginning to suspect. She hadn’t exactly played it cool in her drug-induced, injured state, asking after Hux every time she spoke to the pilot. Poe definitely suspected, even though he might not know exactly what it was he was suspecting.

“I thought he’d been holding you hostage all along,” Poe admitted. “But he pointed out - how could he? You could’ve overpowered him.”

Hux had said that? Rey didn’t think he’d be likely to admit any kind of weakness.

“Rey.” Poe left his chair and sat on the edge of her bed, taking her hands in his. “What happened?”

So she told him. Told him everything. From Hux shooting at her in the hangar, to her impulsive decision to save the man’s life. Deciding on Qiilura, tending the General’s wounds, their uneasy coexistence in the small house.

Poe listened, intently and quietly, without interrupting.

“And then,” Rey took a deep breath, feeling near tears. “Something just _changed_. I don’t know exactly how, or when, but we were enemies, and then we were sort of getting along, and _then_ -“

She met Poe’s eyes, watched his widen, and she knew that he knew.

“No,” he exhaled. “No. _Really?_ You. You… and Hux?” She managed a tiny nod. “Shit, Rey.”

The dam broke, and Rey buried her face in her hands as the tears came. Poe’s arms immediately went around her, and it only made her feel worse.

“I’m sorry,” she hiccoughed. “I’m so sorry. I never meant, I didn’t think-“

“Rey.” Poe leaned back and gently pried her hands away from her face. “Rey, it’s okay.”

“No, it’s not.” She objected, futilely wiping at the still falling tears with one hand.

“Look, I’m not angry with you. Okay?” He peered into her face, and Rey was startled to realize that he was telling the truth.

“You should be,” she challenged with a sniffle.

“No.” He shook his head. “It’s all a bit weird, but Rey, you’ve been through so much. We all have. And you’ve given nearly everything you have for the Resistance. I’m not about to judge you for anything you did to cope.”

Rey was profoundly aware of how very lucky she was to have Poe for a friend. She threw her arms around his shoulders, hugging him tight. He held her close until she shifted away, asking the question that she knew she needed to ask.

“He’s going to be executed, isn’t he?” Her voice was quiet.

Poe nodded. “Yes, I think so.” To his credit, he didn’t look particularly joyous about it.

“I assumed as much.”

“Rey.” She glanced up to meet his eyes. “Do you have feelings for him?”

Rey couldn’t deny it. She sniffed, tried to offer a shrug. She couldn’t hide the emotion in her expression, much as she wished to.

“ _Shit_.” Poe breathed out heavily. “You’re in love with him.”

Rey looked away. “It doesn’t matter,” she said bitterly. “He doesn’t feel the same. He made that perfectly clear when he threatened my life to save himself.”

“Is that why you let yourself get shot?”

Her eyes snapped back to his. “I don’t know. It was a lot of things. I was angry. I didn’t want him to get away with it, but I didn’t want to watch him die either. I thought if he was going to threaten me, he might as well see what it felt like to actually go through with it.” She shook her head. “If nothing else, it seemed a way to get you to stop shooting at each other.”

Poe sighed. “Next time, please just disarm me.”

She managed a watery smile. “Okay.”

“Rey.” Poe sounded pained. “I can’t do anything about his execution.”

“I know.”

“He’s responsible for millions of deaths. He destroyed an entire system of innocent people.”

“His troopers killed Finn,” she whispered.

“I wish I could fix this for you,” Poe said, pulling her back into his arms. “I really do.”

“I know,” she repeated. “I know.”

 

\------------

 

When the door to his cell slid open, Hux assumed it would be Dameron.

He was not expecting it to be Rey.

She looked… not great. Paler than usual, her movements slow. Her shoulder was still bothering her, he could tell by the way she held it.

The door closed behind her, Rey stopping just inside. Hux got to his feet.

“I didn’t expect you to come,” he offered, when she said nothing.

Rey shrugged. “I nearly didn’t.”

“How’s your shoulder?”

“It’s fine.”

“It wasn’t my intention to hurt you,” Hux found himself saying. “You should know that.”

Her eyes narrowed. “Wasn’t it?”

That hint of guilt flared up again at her sharp tone. Hux pushed it down. Hurting her _hadn’t_ been his intention, not _really_.

“You’re going to be executed,” she said then, eyes not meeting his.

“Yes, I’m well aware.”

“You won’t see me again, after this.”

Was it strange that the thought made him a little bit sad? “I know.”

She turned, as if to leave, before abruptly turning back. “On Qiilura, you said that I was just a means to an end.” She was meeting his eyes now, and hers were blazing. “Is that all it was?”

For kriff’s sake, how was he supposed to answer that? The only way he could. “Yes.”

“None of it was real?”

A series of unwelcome emotions shot through Hux’s mind. None of them showed on his face. “No.”

Rey pressed her lips together tightly, giving a short nod. “I appreciate your honesty.” She turned to leave once again, only pausing at the door. “Goodbye, Hux.”

The door had closed behind her before he found his voice. “Goodbye, Rey.”

It was better this way.

 

\------------

 

“How did it go?” Poe was sitting at the table in Rey’s quarters, while she moved aimlessly about the small space. Staying still was difficult these days, meditation downright impossible. She knew that Poe was asking about her visit to Hux the previous day, the visit that she had insisted on being permitted. She still wasn’t exactly sure why she’d needed it.

“Fine.” Poe looked unconvinced. “He told me everything that I needed to know.”

“It’ll be tomorrow at dawn,” he said quietly.

Rey glanced up from the tunic she’d been folding. And refolding.

“It won’t be public,” Poe continued. “And I don’t think you should be there.”

“I won’t be.” She set the tunic down and turned to fully face him. “And I’ve been meaning to tell you. I don’t think I should stay here.”

Poe’s eyes widened. “What are you talking about?”

Rey took the seat opposite his. “I’m not coping well, Poe, with _any_ of this. Don’t pretend you haven’t noticed.” His face indicated that he certainly had. “I need to get away from here. I know I said the same thing right after the battle, but then, with _everything_ ,” - she made a sweeping motion with one hand, unable to put it into words. “I need more time.”

Poe nodded, although he looked slightly pained. “Where will you go?”

“I’m not sure,” she admitted. “Someplace where I can blend in and just be Rey, instead of Rey of the Resistance, or Rey who defeated Kylo Ren, or Rey who was stupid enough to have feelings for-“ She cut herself off, swiftly changing tack. “Definitely _not_ Jakku.”

Poe chuckled at that, and the sound filled Rey’s heart with warmth.

“Will you continue to train?” He wondered. “As a Jedi?”

Rey blinked at the question, realizing with a start that he was asking if she was about to pull a Luke Skywalker, to drop off the grid and cut herself off from the force. She had no intention of doing that.

“Yes,” she replied immediately. “I think that’s what I need now, most of all. To re-center myself, I suppose. And there are other force users out there, I’ve felt them. Eventually, I’d like to find them. But first, I need to-“

“Find yourself?” Poe offered with a smirk.

Rey managed a small smile of her own. “Something like that.”

“Stay until tomorrow, at least,” he advised. “After… I’ll see you off. And I even have a thought about where you might go.”

 

\------------

 

Hux was surveying his uniform. There was still a bit of blood on the fabric from where he’d been shot, but it would have to do. Soon enough, it’d be indistinguishable from the other blood, anyway. Thankfully, he’d had both the foresight and just enough time to put it on in between knocking Rey unconscious and Dameron’s arrival at their appropriated house on Qiilura. He didn’t want to imagine the indignity of being executed in civilian clothing, or worse, anything bearing the Resistance emblem. He’d die proclaiming his allegiance to the First Order, a fitting end.

The door slid open to reveal Dameron. He crossed the small space to Hux, holding something out. A packet of cigarettes.

“I’ve already made my last requests, Commander.”

Dameron smirked. “Consider this a bonus.”

Hux took a cigarette, allowing the other man to light it up. Dameron lit his own, and they smoked in a strange, if not uneasy, silence for a few minutes.

“There’s one thing I’m wondering,” Dameron started, and Hux actually rolled his eyes.

“Naturally.”

“You didn’t tell me about what happened between you and Rey.”

Hux exhaled a puff of smoke. “I presume she’s filled you in.”

“I wondered why you didn’t. Say anything. I mean, sure, it’s private, fair enough,” Dameron was gesturing with the cigarette. “But that isn’t it, is it?”

“I’m sure I have no idea what you mean.”

Dameron turned to fully face him. “You were protecting her.”

Hux raised an eyebrow.

“You knew it could go badly for her if it was known that she’d rescued you, been _involved_ with you.” Dameron took a long drag from his cigarette. “So you kept it to yourself.”

Hux didn’t reply.

“You called her Rey, when I first questioned you.”

Had he? He certainly hadn’t meant to.

“You’re in love with her.” Hux froze. And he hadn’t expected Dameron to be so perceptive. “Aren’t you?”

Hux could deny it. He could refuse to answer. But, really, what did it matter now? He met Dameron’s eyes. The other man looked mildly pleased with himself.

“Yes.”

Dameron nodded, apparently content to leave it at that, and they finished their cigarettes in silence. The pilot turned to go.

“I’ll see you at dawn, General.”

 

\------------

 

There was something Rey needed to do. She’d been putting it off since her release from med bay, but - with her departure set for tomorrow - she couldn’t wait any longer. Twilight was falling as she found her way to the memorial the Resistance had set up for the fallen. She stepped amongst the stones, reading names, many familiar, until she found the one she was looking for.

She sank to her knees before it, mouthing the name etched into the stone.

_Finn_.

“I’m sorry it’s taken me so long.” The words tumbled out into the evening air. “I’ve thought about you every day, almost every minute. I just- I didn’t know what I would say. What I could say, to make up for what I’ve done. I went to Qiilura to grieve, to find a way to say goodbye to you, and instead I-“ Her voice caught. “I feel like I’ve betrayed you, Finn. Like I’ve betrayed everyone. And yet, I can’t help feeling-“ She let off a near shriek.

“I don’t know what to do.” Tears were rolling down her cheeks. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to feel.” Hux had been right, _damn him_ , when he’d accused her of trying to save him, like she’d tried to save Kylo. She hadn’t intended it, but it had happened all the same. And now she was coming apart at the seams, because Hux had never cared about her, because she loved him and he was going to be executed at dawn, because she loved him and she’d never been so ashamed.

“I’m so sorry, Finn. You were my best friend, and I’m so sorry. I’m sorry I couldn’t save you. I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you needed me. I’m sorry that I’ve been so stupid and selfish. I’m so _sorry_.”

As the sun disappeared beneath the horizon, Rey sobbed her apologies onto Finn’s grave.

 

\------------

 

Just before dawn, Dameron came for him. He was flanked by two junior officers, both armed. Hux was waiting for them in the center of the cell, fully dressed in his uniform. He hadn’t slept; really, what was the point? He accepted the restraints without complaint and allowed Dameron to lead him from the cell, the two other officers falling in behind.

Hux had seen little of the base in his time there, but the one route he knew was that between the docking bay and the holding cells. His brow furrowed as he noted them retracing the familiar steps. Admittedly, he didn’t know where his execution was to take place or where else this route might lead. His confusion mounted when they did finally emerge into the hangar.

“Have you changed your mind and decided to toss me out into space instead?” A rather less dignified end than a firing squad.

From the corner of his eye, Hux could see Dameron’s lips quirk. “Tempting, but no.”

They approached a small shuttle, the ramp lowered, and Dameron led him towards it. For the first time, Hux wanted to hesitate, but his pride wouldn’t allow it. _What_ was going on? At the top of the ramp, inside the shuttle, the other man turned to face him. The junior officers had remained outside the ship, leaving them alone.

“Yesterday you told me that you love Rey.” Hux struggled to keep his expression neutral at this unexpected topic of conversation. “Was that the truth?”

“I hardly see how it matters,” he retorted.

“Is it true?” Dameron repeated, with greater insistence.

Hux sighed. “Yes. It’s true.”

Dameron nodded. “In about an hour, Rey is going to board this shuttle. She’s headed to Naboo, the coordinates are preprogrammed. You’re going with her.”

Hux blinked.

“There are a few conditions,” Dameron continued. “You do not leave this shuttle until she arrives, nor do you attempt to leave without her. My officers will remain on board to ensure you comply. You will go to Naboo and nowhere else. If I find out you are anywhere near this base, or attempting to seek out any First Order sympathizers, I will hunt you down and shoot you on sight. I’ll be checking in on Rey periodically, and if you hurt her in any way, I will _shoot you on sight._ Any questions?”

“Are you banishing her on account of me?”

Dameron scoffed. “Hardly. She’s leaving voluntarily, and she’s welcome back at any time. You, not so much.”

Hux could appreciate that.

“She doesn’t know about this,” the other man was saying. “She still thinks you’re being executed.”

“I’m not entirely sure why I’m not,” Hux admitted.

“If any of this is objectionable to you,” Dameron spread his hands, glancing around the shuttle. “Then, by all means, we can proceed with the firing squad.”

In almost any other scenario, Hux would’ve gladly accepted death over banishment. He had absolutely no idea what he’d do on Naboo. He might possibly go insane from the lack of activity. But. He’d be with Rey. He’d have the chance to make things right with her. If she’d let him, that is, given that she didn’t even know about this.

“Why are you doing this?” He asked.

Dameron sighed, taking a moment to respond. “Rey’s lost a lot in this war. Too much. I don’t want her to lose anyone else.”

Hux considered that. “Alright.”

“Alright?” Dameron raised an eyebrow. “Alright, as in, I have your agreement?”

“You have my agreement.”

Dameron removed the restraints, and Hux gently flexed his wrists. “I trust you’ll remember the terms?”

Hux resisted the urge to roll his eyes. “You have my word, Commander.”

The pilot offered his hand, and Hux shook it. “I left you some clothes,” Dameron nodded towards the low bench against one wall. “You’ll attract unwanted attention walking around in that uniform.” He smirked. “I spared you the Resistance insignia.”

“I appreciate that.”

Dameron had just started down the ramp, when Hux called after him.

“How can you be so sure that Rey will even agree to this?”

Dameron turned, fixing him with a sharp look. “Because she’s in love with you, too, you absolute idiot. So try not to fuck it up this time.”

 

\------------

Nearly an hour after dawn, Poe appeared in Rey’s doorway. She didn’t ask. She knew it was done, and she didn’t want to think about it any more than necessary.

“You ready?” He asked quietly.

Rey nodded, clipping her lightsaber to her belt and gathering her bag. With one last glance around her quarters, she followed Poe into the hall.

They walked in companionable silence to the landing pad. At the shuttle, Poe turned to face her, taking her hands in his.

“Don’t be a stranger, okay?” He gave her a gentle smile. “You know you always have a home here. And I _will_ be coming to visit you from time to time. BB-8 will insist on it.”

Rey chuckled at that, squeezing his hands. “Thanks, Poe. I mean it. Thank you for everything.”

He pulled her into a warm embrace and she clung tight. She’d miss this, miss him. But she knew she was doing the right thing, for herself.

“Ship’s all ready to go. Fly safe. And take care of yourself, Rey.”

“I will,” she promised, stepping back and out of his hold. “You, too.”

There were two officers at the base of the ramp, and they stepped aside as she approached. She glanced back as she started up into the ship, offering Poe a wave. She caught his wave back before he disappeared from view. The shuttle - Resistance this time, not First Order - was small, but comfortable. She had entered into a seating area, the cockpit just ahead. There was a door off to her left, to what she knew was sleeping quarters and the refresher.

Rey deposited her bag on one of the seats, before straightening up and taking a deep, calming breath. She turned to head to the cockpit and froze in her tracks.

Hux was standing in the cockpit doorway.

He was dressed in a pair of brown trousers and a simple tunic, bearing no insignia. His hair was slicked back, but a few strands were falling forward over his forehead, as though he’d been running his hand through it. Most startlingly, he was quite clearly alive.

It took Rey several seconds to find her voice. “I thought you were dead.”

“Are you sorry I’m not?”

“No.” The answer came immediately, and it was the truth. “But how?”

“Dameron.” Rey felt her brows lift in surprise. “He’s offered to let me go with you to Naboo. I have to stay there, I can’t ever come back here. Or go looking for any First Order sympathizers.”

Poe had done this for _her_. Her heart surged with warmth for her friend. But still, that didn’t explain-

“Why would you agree to that?” She knew Hux, he wouldn’t take kindly to having to relinquish his hopes of salvaging the First Order. She was surprised he hadn’t preferred death-

“Because I lied to you.” Hux took a few steps forward, then stopped, as though he wasn’t sure how close he ought to get. “When I said that none of it was real. That isn’t true. I love you, Rey.”

Rey blinked. He _what_?

“Dameron figured it out,” Hux continued, when she didn’t immediately respond. “So he offered to let me go with you. If you’ll have me.”

“You… you _love_ me?”

Rey didn’t need to read his mind to gauge Hux’s sincerity. It was pouring off of him in waves. “Yes.”

He was right in front of her now and slightly blurry. When had she started crying? “I am _so_ angry with you.” She’d put her hands on his chest, and she honestly wasn’t sure if she was trying to hit him or hold on for dear life.

“I know.”

“You _used_ me as leverage! I would’ve lied to protect you, and you-“ This time, she did hit him, thumping her fist against his chest, although not hard. She didn’t really want to hurt him. Not now. _Not ever_.

“I know. Rey, I know.” He caught her hands in his, stopping her from shoving at him. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I was thinking only of myself and ignoring what I felt for you, and I’m sorry, Rey.”

She couldn’t deny his honesty. She couldn’t seem to stop crying either, and she didn’t resist when he put his arms around her, pulling her close. When she’d regained some control, she took a slight step back, peering up at him. More emotion than she’d ever seen him express was swirling in his blue eyes.

“I haven’t forgiven you yet, you know,” she told him with a sniffle, although there was no heat to her words.

“Yet?” A faint smile played around the edges of his mouth. “Does that mean there’s hope?”

“Maybe.” Rey was already losing her resolve, torn between making him suffer and getting him to smile again. More. As often as possible.

He brushed a strand of hair back from her face. “It seems I’ll have plenty of time to make it up to you.”

She nodded. “You’d better.” And then she was going up on her tiptoes, seizing the front of his shirt, and pressing her lips to his.

He kissed her back fiercely, arms sliding around her waist. When they broke for air, she pulled back only slightly, lips hovering a breadth away from his.

“I love you, too.”

 

\------------

 

They settled into the cockpit, Hux in the pilot’s seat. He seemed to want to take care of things, of _her_ , and Rey decided she’d let him. For the moment, anyway. He was supposed to be making it up to her, after all.

“So you really can fly,” she mused, a bit teasingly, as she watched him navigate out of the docking bay with surprising ease.

“I did tell you I could,” he retorted with a smirk.

“I didn’t think Generals typically flew their own ships.”

“They don’t.” He glanced at her sideways. “But I wasn’t always a General. And I’m not one now.”

She sat up from lounging in the co-pilot’s seat to assist with lightspeed preparations, and then they were shooting forward into space, headed for Naboo.

“Are you really okay with this?” She asked then.

Hux sat back in his seat and held out a hand. Rey unfolded herself from her own chair and went to sit in his lap. He gingerly touched the edge of the bandage on her shoulder, where it was peaking out from under her shirt collar.

“I don’t think I’ve ever felt more fear than when you were shot,” he admitted quietly. “I thought I’d lost you, and all because I’d put you in that position.” His eyes met hers. “I don’t want to lose you, Rey.”

Running a hand through his hair, she leaned forward to drop a light kiss to his lips. A reassuring gesture. “I’m here.”

“So yes, I’m okay with this. It’s not what I expected, but then, neither were you.” She smiled at that, and Hux tilted his head, looking at her searchingly. “I could ask you the same question. I don’t want you to be isolated from the Resistance because of me.”

Rey shook her head. “I was already planning on leaving. Being with the Resistance, it’s too hard right now. Too many memories. I don’t know what will happen in the future, but - for now - I need this.”

“I’m sorry about Finn.”

Rey looked at him in surprise, sensing nothing but honesty. “Are you?”

Hux sighed. “I’m sorry that it hurts you.”

And Rey could understand. While Hux might never be able to look past Finn’s defection from the First Order, he loved her enough to be empathetic to her pain. She could work with that. “Thank you.”

“What’s on Naboo?” He asked, after a few moments of silence.

“Leia had some property there, in the country. General Organa,” she tacked on, unsure if Hux would know her first name. “Poe thought she’d like for me to use it.”

“What do you plan to do there?”

“I don’t know, exactly. I suppose we’ll have to figure it out together.” Rey sat up straighter, as something occurred to her. “Hux, I don’t even know your first name.”

“Armitage.”

“Armitage?”

He huffed. “Yes. But I’d far prefer if you just continued to call me Hux.”

Rey tipped her head to the side, considering. “I don’t know, maybe I could come up with a nickname.”

The expression on his face had her breaking into giggles. Actual _giggles_. It felt good to laugh.

“No? No nickname?”

Hux lifted his eyes to the ceiling. “What have I gotten myself into?”

Still giggling, Rey planted a kiss on his cheek. She curled up against him, her head on his shoulder, and his arms settled around her. “You love me.”

She could feel him drop a light kiss to her hair. “I do.”

And Rey stared out the viewport into space, thinking about the Resistance base she was leaving behind, and their new life on Naboo drawing ever nearer. She’d expected to leave alone, and was relieved and overjoyed to find herself - miraculously - with Hux. She wasn’t exactly sure what their future would hold, or what their life would be like, but they’d just have to take it one day at a time.

And, Rey thought, she might just be okay with that.

 


End file.
